January 29th, 2009

(no subject)

Title: Reliable
Length: One-shot ((1196 words))
Author: HolyStarDown
Pairing: Yunjae
Rating: PG
Genre: Romance, angsty-ish
Disclaimer: i only own them in my dreams
Summary: Yunho falls into doubt after the Hey x3! filming that questioned his abilities, and only Jaejoong can help him get through it.
Author's Note: think of this a an "i'm sorry" one-shot for taking so long with LFW :] i wrote it in an hour right after i saw the hey x3 show... and yeah. better AN after the fic



Yunho let the cold air press around him, tingling his skin as he stared into the nighttime city lights. A thin ring of steam had formed around the hand he pressed to the window as if it were a block of soothing ice. He stood there in complete silence and ignored the commotion from the miniature party in the next room he’d left earlier than the other four members. Images of the ‘Hey! x3’ filming they finished earlier that day were still fresh in his mind; all the unknowingly hurtful remarks he laughed off, all the side comments he was forced to hold back for politeness’s sake. He knew perfectly well that the show was meant to be funny, but he’d left the studio with a heavy heart. He’d been reluctant to do anything besides stay home that day in the first place so he could make it special for someone who made every day of his life special, and all of that went to ruin.


He was barely able to keep that phony smile on his face long enough to make it to the room he shared with Jaejoong immediately after the dinner the latter cooked for them all. He stayed pressed against this window ever since.


“Louder! You’re not a microwave!”


“He’s the most reliable.” “Is that so?” “We don’t even know what he’s saying!”


“No matter how you look at him, he still doesn’t look reliable.”


An accusing finger pointed his way. “Is that what you call reliable?”


“See? He’s always making the last summary.” “Don’t make any more assumptions!”


“The youngest yet the most reliable.” “Then why isn’t he the leader?”


He shuddered as the insults played in his mind again. They were supposed to be harmless comments intended to make the audience laugh, but Yunho took them personally. The electric words stung his heart, twisted knots in his stomach, and made it harder and harder to maintain his composure. He knew the other members felt it as well; their little gestures of assurance while he was staring out of the van’s window and chewing his nails down to the skin told him so. He also knew that Jaejoong’s hug was a result of more than just the sausage opening victory.


The soft click of the door quietly opening and a quiet ‘goodnight’ followed by a click of the door closing again tainted the room’s eerie stillness. He didn’t need to turn around to know who just came in.


A pair of warm arms wrapped around his waist and the face he knew so well pressed against the back of his shoulder, fitting as if they were made to mold together.


“Happy birthday Jaejoong-ah.”


All he got was a soft hum in reply.


Yunho stood completely still, basking in his lover’s comforting presence. They swayed from side to side to music only they could hear. Words weren’t needed to convey the solemn emotions he’d held in for most of the day. Nor were they needed to convey Jaejoong’s want to take them away from him.


Jaejoong finally broke the thick silence, his lips moving against the bare skin on Yunho’s shoulder. “You’re going to catch a cold if you go shirtless all night Yunnie… Especially if you’re near this window,” he muttered.


“It doesn’t matter,” Yunho replies. The words were barely even a whisper.


“Of course it does…” Jaejoong threaded his thin fingers through Yunho’s hair subconsciously as he spoke and long after silence took hold of them again. The waves of Yunho’s insecurity crashed against him and sent droplets of pain to the floor. At first he’d only thought about how much he didn’t want to be doing a television show on his birthday but every dry smile his lover gave to the camera shot holes in his selfish ideas, every hollow laugh shattered his soul. He hurt with Yunho, not for him.


“Don’t let them get to you Yunho-ah. You know they didn’t mean those things… They were just trying to be funny.”


“I know.”


The city lights cast long shadows in the dark room, matching the emotions that ran wild between them. The only difference that he was demeaned out of humor made was that Yunho couldn’t be mad at the hosts- only himself for being open to the little barbs.


“Am I reliable Joongie?” Yunho asked with his voice sounding as vulnerable as a child thrown out into the world on their own.


Jaejoong planted a feather-light kiss on Yunho’s frozen shoulder before fully shutting his eyes. “You’re very reliable leader-shii.”


“Am I a good leader?” the taller man whispered. He moved his hand to a different place on the window and watched the steam ring fade away as another formed.


Jaejoong’s answer was felt more than heard. “You’re an amazing leader.”


Eternity long seconds ticked away and left the elder’s words hanging in the air. The new cold seeped through the skin of Yunho’s hand, attempting to make his entire body numb. “I don’t believe you,” he whispered.


Jaejoong sighed, warm air splaying against Yunho’s goosebump-covered skin before he stepped away from his lover. “Look at me,” he demanded. Yunho hesitated but Jaejoong would have none of it. He pulled on Yunho’s shoulder until the younger man faced him, eyes downcast. “I said look at me Yunho.”


His head felt far too heavy for the simple task. He just couldn’t look into the perfect man’s eyes. He was horrified that if he did, he’d see that Jaejoong was merely lying to boost his confidence. He leaned back against the window, letting the cold soak into the bare skin of his back.


Jaejoong lifted Yunho’s chin with his finger when he stayed still, forcing the younger to look at him. “Who always makes sure we get out of the house on time for an event?” he asked.


“Manager Hyung.”


Jaejoong raised a questioning eyebrow. “I didn’t see him anywhere near here this morning, and he certainly wasn’t the one who finally got Yoochun out of bed.”


Yunho said nothing.


“Who always makes sure we get out of the house on time for an event?”


“…I do.”


Jaejoong smiled with his eyes and leaned closer to the man he loved. “Who always makes sure our schedule is straightened out?”


“I do.”


“Who corrects us when we mess up during dance rehearsal?”


“I do.”


“Who makes sure we stay in line during interviews?”


“I do.”


Jaejoong smiled with his lips now, almost fully pressed against Yunho’s own. “Mmhmm. Who keeps Minnie and me from one-touching each other to death?”


“I do.”


He lifted Yunho’s hand to caress his cheek as his eyes slid closed again. “And who can I rely on to love me uncontrollably no matter what?”




Yunho’s answers were rewarded by a soft, loving kiss. He wrapped one arms around Jaejoong’s waist as he stepped away from the window and kept the other hand on the ivory skin of Jaejoong’s cheek. The night’s chill faded and was replaced by his lover’s radiating warmth. The ‘Hey! X3’ hosts’ jokes were washed away and replaced by Jaejoong’s reassurances.


The world stopped turning and the only thing left was them.






A/N: a few things about this… for those of you who don’t know what show I’m talking about, here are the links to part one and two and the sausage opening contest http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88R2H5tuEPA (part 1) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFdTMVgAgg0 (part 2) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAf_bnbH15U&feature=related (sausage opening contest and bolero performance) EDIT: the person who had the subbed version removed the videos, so all i have now is the unsubbed. sorry!

I decided to write this because during the show, the MC’s were poking at Yunho a lot and Yunho’s expressions after they said something about him just killed me… I know they were just joking and all but still, I think our wonderful leader-shii was really affected by what they said. I could be totally wrong but that’s how I saw it.

ALSO! I know the episode was filmed before JJ’s birthday, but I’d already written it this way before I got out from under my rock and realized it aired on his birthday.
EDIT: i just watched the bolero perf. and... yunho looks like he's about to cry... that's most likely because it's just a really emotional song but, hey, i'm making a connection


Letters From War Update: I know I said I’d have it by LAST Monday… ((please don’t shoot me moon1084 ^^;;)) and then I tried to have it up for Jae’s birthday… obviously I failed at both and I’m really really sorry. All I can say is that I’m almost done and I hope to have it up soon! Take this one-shot as an ‘I’m sorry’ present :]

I love you all, I swear!


Please remember to comment so i'll work harder to get ch11 up!!

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